Lived Experience Forum

[Flying_Hams]

 I've been on these forums for a long time. I don't plan on leaving any time soon. But I just wanted to say this today - finally I think I am at the best stage in my journey in life, let alone mental health, than I have ever been. 

The things that used to plague me have more or less disappeared. But in their place exist new responsibilities and challenges. This won't ever end - maybe not til I hit retirement. But who knows. 

When I came to these forums I was in my mid 20s and still had a lot of potential in life. I guess now that I have realised that potential more and more I am realising that I've pushed myself. And I've got to a better place. I now have a job which is for all intents and purposes, within my industry - i spoke to my gp today about this and he said by the time he hit 33 he had realised that in the end being a doctor was a job for him - we've all been sold a narrative. He said he had a UAI of 98.1 and this was the lowest in his friend group. Strange hey? that's so high and yet he was still thinking it was low. 

Finally I've reached  aplace in life where I can say 2 things at the same time - number one is that I've finally hit a role in my industry and number two is that i can have a good life around it. It just takes time to adapt to it. I am now looking at a rental. I have decided that it is time now because i also passed the probation period at work. I will pace myself on this and see what transpires. I believe it is the best time now that I'm in what is probably the best place I've ever been.

I'm being more compassionate to myself lately and have learned (even though it has been hard) to try and force myself to be better to myself. I think being stuck in the rut of depression prevented me for so long, from actually enjoying life. But my generation is facing so many challenges and I think it is normal to have anxieties over the future. 

My relationship has had some hiccups, but this is all part of the experience of growing up i think. It is what it is. We are figuring it out. That's all that matters. Even today I had a weird experience trying to explain something to my family, but i soldierd on through it and spoke with confidence and clarity about something that they said which had bothered me (related to my partner) and it was solved. No dramas. I'm surprising myself each time. 

Right now, I'm in the best space mentally. I am back on meds, but I only see it as a temporary fix. Once I have other stressors levelled out it'll be better. 

Onwards and upwards. I turn thirthy in 6 months time. Scary hey?

[Flying_Hams]

@StuF @SmilingGecko @TAB @Shaz51 @Jacques @Bill16 @Historylover @Judi9877 @outlander @utopia @Snowie @Adge @HenryX @BlueBay @greenpea

and others whom are around today

[Snowie]

So happy to hear the good news @Flying_Hams 

I am glad you feel that way and can see such a huge improvement in your life.

Onwards and Upwards I say too, you should be super proud of yourself and the strength and determination you have shown.

P.S Nothing wrong with entering your 30's!!!😁😁

[Jacques]

Hey @Flying_Hams well what a transformation, when i first met you you had no direction, no purpose and no future, you where so dispondent. you are such an amazing man and i have been so proud of you pushing through and you kept moving even if the steps where small you still took them, i remember we where talking one night and you said no woman was interested in you and that you where going to go through life on your own, that by a certain age you had this check list you needed to forfill.

slowly step by step you found your feet. it has and is a pleasure to watch you grow as a person and flourish.

re your partner, one thing i have learned in my relationship is communication is everything talk to her and speak openly and honestly. i know you will work through things and make an amazing life for yourself. 

proud of you mate

Jacques

[outlander]

thats great @Flying_Hams you should be proud of how far youve come.
looking for a rental and continuing on with your life sounds like a good plan for the near future

[Flying_Hams]

@Snowie
Maybe 30 is the new 50 idk lol
These days I feel content doing very little

But thank you for the kind message.

Good to see you Snow Fox !

[Flying_Hams]

hey mate thanks again @Jacques
yeah today my partner and i are 8 months together... wow that has flown by...

I've also started reading for leisure again. Boy oh boy do i miss it

Yes despondent is a good word for where I once was my friend

Thanks for being around dude. See you about! and thanks again for your support

[Flying_Hams]

hey @outlander
I think you were the first person i spoke to on the forums lol
That was a while ago. It's been good to hear from you now and again. And thanks for your support too!
I hope you're well these days

[Owlunar]

Hi @Flying_Hams 

That is such good news - I am really glad to hear that you are settling down with your life, your job, your relationship - and even pacing yourself to get your own place.

Yes - it's all part of growing up - I remember when I first met you how nervous you were about life - and since then so much disillusionment. Growing up is such hard work - we have so much to learn that no one ever tells us. 

And - actually - all of this is very hard to pass on to our children. I think it's a strong maybe that we have to learn about our own lives for ourselves.

And you will soon be 30 - oh Hams - I remember I once commented that it was so hard being young - and I still really think that - if we are sensitive, intelligent people - it can be harder - I was a bit geeky myself - but self-confident - which made a big difference. I have chosen to be unique - not an easy choice to live out but I am so much older than you and therefore - I can say with authority - being unique is wonderful - and actually - everyone is.

But yes - people often follow the crowd and perhaps lose their individuality to fit it. I think you will be fine - you are learning about yourself - the most important thing to learn - self-knowledge.

Keep it up - I am so glad - so encouraged - for your sake.

Owlunar

[Judi9877]

Good evening @Flying_Hams! I’m so glad to be included in your very inspiring and interesting thread. Thank you very much for including me. I feel honoured that you’ve thought to include me and I value our forum friendship very highly.

You are a great forum friend who has had a lot of challenges yet you’ve managed to deal with each of them successfully to the point of you now being in employment in an area you enjoy which is a massive achievement so well done ⭐️👍🏻! I’m very proud of you and what you’ve achieved. I only hope that I can follow in your footsteps and complete my mental health course and gain employment in this field as you have achieved in your field of expertise. You are truly an inspiration in that regard to me.

You are a great forum member who welcomed me here in the forums when I joined many years ago and I’m so proud that you are choosing to continue your fabulous and wonderful work here as a Community Guide here on the forums. You have so much wisdom and knowledge and experience in many areas of life and I’m very happy that you share these with me and others on the forums.

I’m glad that you are looking at moving into a rental property of your own which has its own challenges and one which I know a lot about having experienced this a lot over the past 7 years here in Victoria. Having a rental property is a massive step in ones adult life and I know you’ll be great at keeping the property in perfect order. You have managed to get and keep a job and that’s a positive sign when looking at rental properties and the application process that goes with it. Good luck with this new endeavour!

Once again, well done on all your achievements in your life and good luck to turning 30 soon! I look forward to following more of your adventures and achievements here in forumland!

Enjoy the rest of your night forumite friend!

Judi9877☺️💐