Lived Experience Forum

[Sehnsucht]

Because, what made you reach out in that way?

How did you take that plunge into the unknown? How did you set aside fears of judgement, of failure, of the hurt that is the sleeping body beside you that is so healthy and adjusted in their life that they still sleep, despite you?

I imagine it is a lot like my first dive into breastfeeding helplines. I feel like these things, these telephone helplines, hold some sort of wierd unexplainable lack of accessibility or understanding, when really they are the answer to all you hope for right now. No need to fear judgement, this is the only forum in which you cannot be judged. Unless everyone is listening. Why can't crisis lines be chat rooms. I hate and fear telephones.

[Sehnsucht]

Clarification, I'm not suicidal, but lonely.

But also scared because if I aas suicidal, why would I call?

[Sehnsucht]

I just read that a Lifeline are being funded by govt to provide a text service. This is amazing and wonderful. If only I knew why this difference where so important!!

I am off to bed, I am safe, while the body next to me is asleep, they are so much to me and I am welcoming sleep. Xx

[Former-Member]

Hi @Sehnsucht. I've used both the Chatline and call service of lifeline and beyond blue before many times. And I've rung suicide call back service. They can be really good when you have got yourself to the point you don't want to be here anymore. I mostly use the lifeline chat. I've also used them heaps when on the verge of self harm. When feeling like I really can't make sense of anything I've rang the SANE helpline too. Beyond blue is really only for depression and anxiety.

It sounds like you're having a tough time right now. Are you still receiving support? Im not sure if I saw you give a call out on night shift before. I'm sorry I had a really weird day and was really hit and miss all over the place on here. If you want to talk about what's going on for you feel free to tag me or just write it here in this thread. I'm sure there will be others that will tune in again too. I'll check back to see too. I hope you are not in distress and have managed to sleep. Hoping this helps Best wishes😊💜

[BlueBay]

Hi @Sehnsucht

I have many times chatted online with Lifeline.  I have also contacted my local CAT team when feeling really bad.  They have been really good, they chatted with me and made sure I was okay.  They asked lots of questions and who my GP and psych were. Each time I have contacted any of these services for help I have come away feeling ok that someone has listened to me; they understand and they support me.

I have also contacted ASCA (adult suriving childhood abuse) and they were amazing.

It is scary to call but each time I have felt good that I did.

I hope you got to have a good sleep.  I hope you can call one of the support people even if it's just for a chat to help you.

Take care 🙂

[Sahara]

Hi @Sehnsucht,

I have used lifeline exactly twice in my life. Both were very positive experiences for me. 

The first time, I had just begun treatment for major depression but the meds were not working for me. I felt terrified of everything and I felt I had no-one to turn too. I was an emotional mess. I could not imagine calling my parents in that state. I feel really broken and desperate but I had to talk to someone or I don't know what would have happened. 

I can't remember much of the conversation, but the man I spoke to at lifeline was very gentle with me. It was such a relief to hear another human voice and it made me feel slightly more sane.

The second time I used lifeline was when my Mum was dying. In my family we always keep our emotions in check and don't express ourselves. So I really felt I could not talk to my brother or sister, even though they each must have been feeling something. I felt very alone and anxious and again, I just wanted to hear another human voice. 

The woman I spoke to was kind. I admire these people who are prepared to help complete strangers. I don't think I could do the work that they do. It must be very difficult.

It was a huge relief to be able to talk to someone over the phone and not feel that I had to hold all my emotions in, for once.

[Doc_Gonzo]

I have called ACIS (now called mental health triage) numerous times with very mixed results. I have called beyond blue once and found them to be okay, I am scared to call lifeline as i know too many people who volunteer there and I am concerned that I will end up speaking to one of them.

New Access is funded a Federal project Managed by Beyond Blue and they might be a good place to get into contact with. They offer phone support and structured sessions that help you to set simple goals.

It might be a way of having a bit more regular contact with a support person. I think they also have access to a 24/7 helpline (don't quote me on that).

[believeinme]

I have called Lifeline twice with differing experiences.  

The first person I got was excellent, thorough, caring and responsive.  

My second call on a different day was a concerning experience. The person answered the phone laughing with a colleague.  She was rushing me to get through the "ASIST model" of suicide intervention.  This model basically has callers talk about the reasons you DON'T want to live then they encourage you to talk about the reasons you DO want to live.  She was not adequately skilled (or something else was going on) so I was left feeling unsupported.  After 15 minutes on the call, she did not pick up on the inflection in my voice that I was not feeling strong enough to get off the phone. She initiated letting me go but encouraged me to call back if I needed to talk again.  Sarcastic: that helped. 

I don't know where this leaves me if I need support in the future.  I'm building my support system so hopefully I won't.  If I were feeling suicidal, I wouldn't want to get the same person that I got that day I called Lifeline.  I hope nobody out there gets her either.  

[Sehnsucht]

It's good to hear that the barrier of making the call in first place breaks away for people at times of need. Reassuring, thank you xx

[Princessmolly]

Hi your post really struck a cord with me. I was so depressed and suicidal after the suicide of my mother when i was pregnant that i called beyond blue.....as did my sister. Neither of us received much practical help off them. It was all generic questions aimed at finding out if we were currently about to commit suicide. We needed to TALK and for someone to listen. I did contact beyond blue with this info in case anyone was wondering. I felt that if i gave the slightest indication of self harm the police would come banging on my door to do a welfare check. While i understand they need to determine if people are at risk i found that their leading questions did nothing to help and made me feel worse.

After i had my baby i reached out to PANDA. I was apprehensive after previous experiences with beyond blue but it changed everything for me. They listened while i cried my way through an entire box of tissues. They cared. They provided practical help in linking me up with a perinatal mental health program who got me the help i needed. They called every few days to see if i was ok and if there was anything i wanted to talk about. I never felt threatened. I felt supported. They were great. I also found australian breastfeeding association to be very helpful. There is help out there you just have to find the right forum or the right fit for you. One day i hope to become one of the councillors for mental health. Prior to my mums death i had hopes of doing my post grad in mental health. That was put on hold while i get through this difficult time but one day i hope to be that voice on the end of the phone