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amber22
Peer Support Worker

***CANCELLED: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Hey everyone!

 

On Thursday 16th March 2023, we will be holding a Peer Group Chat on the topic of Being You & Belonging.

 

amber22_2-1678400792235.gif

 

Whether it’s a space where, or people with whom, you feel comfortable, seen or understood, being able to be yourself can be such a safe and liberating feeling that generates a sense of belonging. Let’s come together and talk about what it means to be ourselves, belong and where we can find or create these spaces. 

 

The event start times across Australia are below:

 

amber22_1-1678400498442.png

 

This is currently held in daylight savings hours:

WA: 4pm 
NT: 5:30pm

SA: 6:30pm 

QLD: 6pm

NSW, ACT, VIC & TAS: 7pm 

 

For anyone unfamiliar with Peer Group Chats, each focuses on a specific topic and is guided by Peer Workers with lived experience of mental health issues and recovery, &/or caring for someone with complex mental health. A counsellor is also present as a moderator to help ensure a safe environment for individuals and the group. It is a space for us as peers to share our stories and experiences, and connect with those who are going through something similar. 

 

Anyone is welcome to join! Tagging some members who may be interested below:

@mr-robot-75 @Hope0011 @Shaz51 @Hams @Appleblossom @Captain24 @Snowie @chibam @Jacques @wellwellwellnez @outlander @NatureLover @Sophia1 @BlueBay @Appleblossom @Eve7 @Bow @Snowie @Shaz51 @JungleGiants @BPDSurvivor @wellwellwellnez @NatureLover @Millieme @Laura4 @creative_writer @Bobbie @tonys @StanD @Owlunar 

 

Peer Group Chats are hosted outside of the forums, using a platform called Chatwee. 

To join an Online Peer Group and participate, you will need to register for an account with Chatwee.
To access the group to observe only and not participate, you can access Chatwee as a Guest.
On the night, follow this link to access Chatwee before the group starts.
You can join our Peer Group Chats every Thursday from 7:00-8:30pm (AEDT). Check out the FAQs page for more information.  

 

 

We hope to see you there 😊 If you can't make it but are interested, you can always catch up reading the transcript afterwards here. We also invite you to continue the conversation below on this thread if you can't make the night but also wish to contribute some of your responses. We will post some dot point prompts on the day that can get the conversation started if you're unable to make the live event!

31 REPLIES 31

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

I won’t be able to make it unfortunately, I’ll be on nightshift. 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Hello @amber22    Thanks for invite,  looks very interesting.  Cant do the chat we thing yet,   "fish flippers for fingers"   but I do hope some one can tag me after,  so I can read all the treasures,  and post my little homework assignment. Then I can  "belong"

 

Did I hear right you are from South Africa.   I   am from Zambia.  Made my escape in the civil war. Very young age thank god,    Panga panga wielding chaps with an attitude in hot pursuit,  so I can relate to your comments to some degree.   We are lucky to have you in Aus.   

 

Hope I haven't  over stepped,  but one day along the track,   I would love to hear your story.

 

Very best intentions,       tonys moon base 1

  

 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

We will miss you! Hope to see you at another one soon 🙂 @Captain24 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Hey there @tonys 

 

That's completely okay! I will ask my friend here at SANE to tag you here after the chat has ended so that you can contribute to the conversation via this thread! 🙂 

 

Oh that is so amazing - I have never been to Zambia. You heard correctly, I immigrated to Sydney from Durban about 10 years ago. A big move and a very different one culturally (I found Australia to be a big culture shock from South Africa) but I am loving the freedom over here. It is nice to not have to worry about safety, but I do miss home from time to time. Missing the snacks too hehe. 

 

Have a lovely day,

Amber22

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

@amber22   thankyou and sorry for late reply.   Long day in the packing shed.

cooksisters  bultounge  and borivouskate  " all spelt wrong' . . .  I know. . .  I do the meat in salt , 

balsamic and herbs,  before the long slow curing process, and think on lost cultures as I chew my way to an aching jaw.   

 

I'm glad you have found a safe and peaceful and safe place to build your nest and belong.

 

Hope to hear more of your story one day when you have a little time.

have a lovely evening

 

      totsiens      tonys moon base 1

 

 

 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Oh yes!! Koeksisters are absolutely delicious - there are luckily a few delis around Sydney that sell them which makes me feel very happy. 

 

Haha biltong will definitely workout your jaw, but it is sooo good.

 

I would love to learn some more about you too and hear about your story! I hope that you're having a good day today 🙂 

 

Amber22

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Hello lovely forum members! 

 

It is with sadness that we have to announce that tomorrow nights Peer Group Chat on 'Being You & Belonging' has been cancelled for this week. We are so sorry for any disappointment caused, and we hope that you can make it along next week!

 

However, we thought that instead of running the live event this week, we would post some of the questions below so that you could respond in your own time or have a discussion in this thread below. We would love to read your responses and share ours here too 🙂 

 

Within this group tonight we’ll be talking about: 

  •  What being yourself and belonging looks like for you 
  •  The spaces that make us feel like we belong the most 
  •  What you need in order to feel comfortably yourself within a space and how you might be able to contribute to creating this space for others 

 

Here are the questions on Being You & Belonging

 

Q1: What does being yourself look like for you? What might a sense of belonging look like? 

Q2: When you have the opportunity to be yourself safely, what emotions arise for you and how does it make you feel? Or, how do you imagine it might feel? 

Q3: Do you have spaces where you feel you can be yourself? If so, where/what are these spaces? If not, where might you be able to seek out these safe spaces? 

Q4: What do you need in order to feel comfortably yourself in a space? What are the qualities that other people would need to have in these spaces in order for you to feel safe being yourself? 

Q5: How might we be able to help create spaces where we and others feel safe to be ourselves? 

Q6: What do you imagine some of the impacts might be if you are able to engage in more spaces where you feel comfortable to be yourself? 

Q7: What might it mean to belong as yourself? 

 

If you wanted to research further into some resources about Being You & Belonging, we recommend you having a look at these: 

1. Worksheet on identity: https://socialself.com/Identity-worksheet.pdf  

2. Why Belonging is so important: https://www.forbes.com/sites/tracybrower/2021/01/10/missing-your-people-why-belonging-is-so-importan...  

3. The practice of being yourself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CNVtn26zqQ  

4. Belonging is not about fitting in: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abfhtWPOya4   

 

Thank you for being so understanding, and for always supporting these Peer Group Chats! We cant wait to read through your responses or discussions that you come up with below 🙂 

 

Keep an eye out for the next Peer Group Chat discussion about ‘Learning to Live With Anxiety’. 

 

If you’d like to be informed about future Peer Group Chats, you can sign up to our mailing list here https://www.sane.org/peer-support/peer-group-chat . You can also ask questions for us to discuss in future peer chats! See you next week ❤️

 

amber22_0-1678837410672.gif

 

@tonys @Captain24 @CatMom 

@mr-robot-75 @Hope0011 @Shaz51 @Hams @Appleblossom @Captain24 @Snowie @chibam @Jacques @wellwellwellnez @outlander @NatureLover @Sophia1 @BlueBay @Appleblossom @Eve7 @Bow @Snowie @Shaz51 @JungleGiants @BPDSurvivor @wellwellwellnez @NatureLover @Millieme @Laura4 @creative_writer @Bobbie @tonys @StanD @Owlunar 

 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

Hey everyone, 

Happy to get us started with a few of my own thoughts and ideas on the questions @amber22 has posed 😊

 

Q1: What does being yourself look like for you? What might a sense of belonging look like? 

For me, being myself can include having an absence of a feeling like I have to ‘hide’ aspects of myself, whether that be for my own protection or the comfort of others. Not that 'the comfort of others' is necessarily a great reason for something like this...

I think of a sense of belonging as being an acceptance of me to the point where I feel like I'm valued and a welcome part of something (like a social group or work team for example).



Q2: When you have the opportunity to be yourself safely, what emotions arise for you and how does it make you feel? Or, how do you imagine it might feel? 

For me, these scenarios where I can safely be myself brings a really strong feeling of liberation and often, also relief, because these spaces aren't necessarily every space.

 

Q3: Do you have spaces where you feel you can be yourself? If so, where/what are these spaces? If not, where might you be able to seek out these safe spaces? 

In many ways, these kinds of spaces are ones I'm still discovering. But these safe spaces can be, for example, by myself, with my dog, with close and trusted loved ones or in a setting where I am surrounded by like-minded people. For example, if I am among peers who I know share an aspect of my lived/ living experience, I am more likely to feel safe and comfortable to be open about these experiences, and in effect, be more myself.

 

Q4: What do you need in order to feel comfortably yourself in a space? What are the qualities that other people would need to have in these spaces in order for you to feel safe being yourself? 

The things I need and qualities of others which would help make spaces feel safer for me to be myself are very similar, if not one and the same. They include, among other things, acceptance and respect. Acceptance of who I am, including things that may be different from the other person and respect for both those differences and things that may be important related to those differences. As a few general examples, this could look like accommodations for someone with disability or openly sharing pronouns to better ensure a space is safe and welcoming for people from the LGBTQIA+ community.

This kind of safe space is also often facilitated for me by sense of psychological safety, empathy, connection and being embraced. Most of these qualities are reflected in this image below, which itself was borrowed from a Ted Talk by Carin Taylor, which you can find here

Screen Shot 2023-03-14 at 11.54.39 am.png

Q5: How might we be able to help create spaces where we and others feel safe to be ourselves? 

One huge thing I can think of in creating safe spaces is avoiding assumptions and having an awareness of the possibility of different needs and where possible, trying to pre-empt and normalise these. For example facilitating introductions inclusive of pronouns, Asking about access needs or if there's any other information that might be helpful to know to help someone feel safer and more supported and comfortable. Of course, I feel it's important to note this might not all happen at once, because a lot of these kinds of things are very sensitive and personal to individuals, so it might take time to develop the comfort and courage to openly discuss these kinds of things with another person, particularly if there’s been a lot of rejection, judgement or trauma in the past, for example. But, I feel like pre-empting and normalising can help signal a degree of safety and acceptance from the start.

 

Q6: What do you imagine some of the impacts might be if you are able to engage in more spaces where you feel comfortable to be yourself? 

For me, it would, and does, certainly eliminate a great deal of pressure and stress to not feel like I have to hide in plain sight, or in some cases effectively ‘put on a show’, because having to do these things can be absolutely exhausting, and it takes a toll too!

 

Q7: What might it mean to belong as yourself?  

For me, this would mean having a sense of acceptance, value and being part of something as myself. Not a version of myself, and ideally not part of myself, but my best/ whole self. Not who I might feel a need to pretend to be or who someone else tries to make me be. Because there is a difference between belonging and fitting in. To me to truly belong is to get to truly be myself, and that, to me, means the world.

 

I'm really looking forward to hearing everyone's thoughts if you'd like to share with us 😊

@tonys @Captain24 @CatMom 

@mr-robot-75 @Hope0011 @Shaz51 @Hams @Appleblossom @Captain24 @Snowie @chibam @Jacques @wellwellwellnez @outlander @NatureLover @Sophia1 @BlueBay @Appleblossom @Eve7 @Bow @Snowie @Shaz51 @JungleGiants @BPDSurvivor @wellwellwellnez @NatureLover @Millieme @Laura4 @creative_writer @Bobbie @tonys @StanD @Owlunar @tyme 

 

Re: Peer Group Chat // Being You & Belonging // Thursday 16th March 2023, 7-8:30PM AEDT

@tonys, I know I also spoke about another element of that wonderful poem you shared that fits well with this space. In that poem, you wrote; 

"Too belong and be accepted in this world.   That is the wish for those  who live in my world.
To be sketched as a person for just one day." What I'm curious about with this is what you think it would take for you to be able to be sketched as a person?
I'm also wondering if any answers to the questions above may link in with this? 😊 

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