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Aussie23
New Contributor

Bf with PTSD

Hi there, I'm a new member. My partner has PTSD and I'm looking to make friends I can so I can get advice and just talk to. He has had to live with me through quarantine and it's making my mental health decline. I'm not used to anybody living with me. Not to mention something who snores and has night terrors. My sleep schedule has been thrown totally off course because I can't sleep. I also lost my job so I'm just stuck in my house and kinda losing my mind. Anyone willing to chat with me, let me know. Thanks

5 REPLIES 5

Re: Bf with PTSD

hello and welcome @Aussie23 

how are you today 

these times are hard  and letting you know you are not alone my friend 

@outlander@Faith-and-Hope , @Former-Member 

Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Bf with PTSD

@Aussie23 hi, welcome. I have PTSD so I understand 

Re: Bf with PTSD

Hi @Aussie23 and welcome to the forums.

 

Whike I don't have PTSD, I feel for you ..... I have been living with someone for many years who is suffering from something undiagnosed, and it sorta leaks out in difficult to live with behaviours.

 

He has left now, but something I did while he  was still here was return to studies so I had something else to focus on.  You might not be able to study, but if you take up something that you have always wanted to do for the time you are in isolation and without a job, the distraction can really help.

 

It might be something like arranging photos in an album or frames, or growing herbs from seeds, or painting a picture, or Soduko / crosswords ..... something personal to you.

 

I used to paint my nails in my favourite colours so I was looking at them all time and the colour was a pick-me-up.  So is wearing favourite clothes.

 

Try a new recipe maybe ?

 

It doesn't get to the bottom of the real issues, I know, but it is a form of self-care, and it's important to look after you.

 

The Sane chat line might help too.

 

Sending some virtual hugs your way .....

Re: Bf with PTSD

Hi there. I'm a new member too, just signed up today actually. My boyfriend has PTSD and it's been really tough living together for some time now. My mental health has deteriorated to such an extent that I'm not sure who I am anymore. 
He is such an amazing person, but then all of a sudden he would get very angry over something, and then become verbally abusive towards me, ultimately ending in me becoming afraid and wanting to leave the house, and him trying to keep me here...

We've been going around in circles like that for a while now. 
Eventually, on Saturday things got to the point where I was really afraid that he's going to hurt me, and called the police. He left while I was on the phone to them, and ended up admitting himself to hospital to get the help that he needs. 
He has no one else to support him through this time, but me...

I still love him (or love the person I met 5 years ago) but my biggest fear is him coming home after treatment and going through it all again. 
He moved in with me 2 years ago and it's been the most traumatic time of my life. I am 50 years old.  
I've come to realise that I don't want to share my living space with anyone again, my mental health would decline so much that I'd end up in hospital. 
But he needs me, and I am his only support, so how do I tell him that?

Sorry about rambling on, but I needed to get this out of my system, I am traumatised and so is he... Any advice will do. 

Re: Bf with PTSD

Hey @Amie2,  

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. It sounds like you have been afraid of your boyfriend in cycles recently, and I'm sorry it got to the point where you really thought you could be harmed. I'm relieved to hear that you called the police in this situation.

 

I can hear you now feel strongly that for your safety and wellbeing you can't have him living with you. That's so important to be thinking about, and I can hear it's painful because you know he's vulnerable too.

 

Please keep reaching out here for support and welcome to the forums. If you would like to tag a member just put an @ in front of their name and they will receive a notification of your post 🌻

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