Skip to main content

Support Promote Advocate

for Borderline Personality Disorder

Forums Home
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Useful resources

Former-Member
Not applicable
2 REPLIES 2

Re: Mental health and self employment

Wow @Former-Member, these are great sites , thank you

With the list below , my mr shaz has Bipolar11 and has questioned all these respones

What threatens our mental stability?-- being self - employed

  • A sense of losing control of our 'self' identity, our choices and the outcomes we are aiming for
  • Being thwarted by others - including our competitors or prospective buyers
  • Frustration at not having the green light to move forwards when we want or need it
  • Fear of failure and shame and the dread of having to go back to 'employment'
  • Inadequate time management, self-motivation and self-organisation, and not having workable structures in place for these
  • Keeping ourselves on track - if we don't have accountability partners or mentors
  • Feeling isolated adversely affects our overall well-being - many business owners work alone and have no social outlets with a team or colleagues
  • Wearing all the hats, juggling the balls and spinning the plates! Trying to do it alone (or not being able to meet the cost of outsourcing) can easily lead to overwhelm and burnout
  • Responsibility not only to yourself, family and business success (and perhaps a workforce), but to legal compliance too
  • Shame at your lack of success
  • Envy of others at your success - which might mean that you no longer fit in with them, or even become 'outcast' from a social group
  • Changes in your other relationships - and the need to re-evaluate and re-define boundaries and expectations.
  • Lack of self care or 'me-time' – because there are too many other things that you allow to come first. When building a business you may not be able to afford or justify spending time and money on yourself
  • No sick leave – instead you soldier on and follow the advice of not 'quitting' and of being consistent
  • Having to deal with rejection – perhaps daily
  • Public speaking and other self promotional activities which don't suit your personality and preferences
  • Not having a safety net – to catch you if you fall down financially or emotionally
  • Adopting a false persona and pretending to be OK - and more confident and competent than you really feel. Living a lie drains your energy and authenticity.

Re: Mental health and self employment

Hello @Former-Member 

How can we help ourselves? and our partners

  • Spend time alone in quiet contemplation – but NOT listening to any inner critic or self-sabotaging phrases. This intended solitude – preferably in nature for 30 minutes a day - allows us to creatively find solutions to problems that our logical conscious mind struggles with
  • Identify and develop your own self monitoring and self regulation system. Learn how to observe and monitor your inner state and to reach out for help from the right sources if needed - to guide and support you and your progress. If finances permit, appoint a therapeutic mentor to offload to, check things out with, and normalise your concerns and reactions – and to help you to understand and manage our emotions, boundaries and behaviours. No bullying coaches allowed!
  • Keep yourself on track with clear lists and aims – and not with gruelling performance targets!
  • Stay in the zone you are best at to get the bulk of your tasks done. Do try other areas for size - and if they're also a good fit then add them into the mix (e.g. a new type of marketing)
  • Support your own self-esteem and self-concept – talk and behave towards yourself as you would a child you cared deeply for (we all still carry an 'inner child' around with us – who needs the loving kindness and support that may have been lacking in our formative years)
  • Learn the inter-personal skills needed to help you to deal with 'difficult' people – so that you remain empowered and assertive (and don't slip back into feeling like a powerless child again)
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance

privacy statement | disclaimer | contact | Australian BPD Foundation Limited ABN: 83 163 173 439

We acknowledge and respect the traditional custodians of these ancestral lands. We acknowledge the deep feelings of attachment and relationship of Aboriginal people to country.