Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Daisydreamer]

Welcome @tyme, we are so happy to have you here as our guest tonight sharing your experience of living with BPD 🙂

Look forward to learning alongside our community tonight and hearing your insights from experience 🙂

[BlueBay]

Thanks @Daisydreamer 

as a person with BPD i find it hard for hubby to understand.  so what could i do for hubby to understand BPD a bit better.  I feel that the carers must find it extremely difficult to know what to do because of our fluctuating emotions.

[tyme]

So let’s start with, What is Borderline Personality Disorder?

In lay terms, BPD is a mental health condition that affects thought and behaviour patterns in a way that hinders functionality in society. Put it this way… if a person with BPD (pwBPD) lived on an island all by themselves, no one would know their BPD existed. The marked difference between a borderline and a non-borderline is their ability to form and maintain healthy relationships. So, when another person is placed on this island… it’s great at first, but soon, things change…

Would I have BPD if I existed on my own island?

As carers, maintaining healthy relationships with a pwBPD can pose a challenge. Let’s hear from you.

[Daisydreamer]

Some of our amazing members have already started to talk about this next question 🙂 For those just joining in the community: What has been your experience of caring for someone living with BPD? 

[BlueBay]

@Daisydreamer 

i can answer that on behalf of my hubby !!!!   my fits of rage, my emotions going up and down

"walking on eggshells"

[Daisydreamer]

A really thought provoking analogy @tyme!

[PTG]

Just finding out what the illness is took me 39 years

[cloudcore]

@Determined carer burnout is so challenging, and it's okay to still be working your way out of it today 💛 

I'd love to know what you've done to take care of yourself during this period (which may come up as a question later as well!)? Burnout and self care is so important to talk about!

[BlueBay]

Hi @PTG  don't worry it took me 45 years to find out I had BPD

[tyme]

Very good point @BlueBay .

I've often questioned - if i was caring for someone with BPD, would I stick around? How would it affect me?

Over the years, I come to appreciate that carers stay around because they CARE. Being a carer for a person with BPD can be so rewarding. Strengths in carers come to light when caring for someone with BPD. We will be looking at some of these strengths later.

I can see your hubby can see the beautiful side of you. Remember, you are not your diagnosis. There is a part of you that means so much more to your husband than your BPD.

What do you think?

tyme