Lived Experience Forum

[BlueBay]

@Owlunar@utopia@Razzle@Zoe7@outlander @Faith-and-Hope

I’m in my own room and I’m unsettled. Crying. Did all the usual stuff - fill out form, urine sample, unpack my stuff. 

Broke down thinking have I made the right decision. The finances aren’t going to get better. It will take time. 

Ok I know I need this break I’ve been saying it fir weeks. I need to use the services provided to me. Use the staff to chat and help me. 

Im not hiding away it’s jusy I got too overwhelmed and it was getting worse. 

My mind is thinking of so much atm. 

[Owlunar]

That's normal @BlueBay -  you've done this before

Your financial situation will take time to sort out - but here's the thing - when you have had a good break there and had extra therapy you will be stronger and have a plan to fix this situation

When you have the chance discuss talking about huffnpuff's "Don't worry" attitude - he has to get the idea that he coud contribute to improving the situation but adding his CONCERN and you need to think about CONCERN for you situation

Huffnpuff can pick up extra hours doing a part time job and when you have had time to recover and sort your head out you can do the same - of you have some ideas to work on you can work towards improvement - but this doesn't start from where you are right now because you are tired and confused - 

You have already done so much - yes - I know you will not be working for the duration of your time in hospital but use the time to think and rest and rest and think and build up your mind and body to take on the world many people battle in - financial stress

It's so hard - I know - I know what it takes to run a home and cars and have the clothing necessary to go to work in public and it is all work - it's all hard and it all leads to a better future

But for today - cry a bit - you have needed this time for ages

Dec

[BlueBay]

I’m feeling really depressed 

not doing group today. They let me settle in on day one. 

But there’s this one nurse who annoys the crap out of me snd wbo has her this afternoon ? - me!! She strolls in just now snd wants to know r erything. I didn’t tell her one thing. I’ll tslk to the other nurses tomorrow because this one talks down to me like I’m some stupid child. 

Had a little nap. I’ve got a sore shoulder pain going up to my head. The medical doctor (I’ve had him a few times before) just saw me and has ordered an ultrasound of my shoulder. 

Waiting fir hubby to come anytime now with my D snd ayla. Can’t wait to get my cuddles. I miss her already. 

My shoulder is so sore every time I move my right arm it hurts. Don’t know what I’ve done. 

[Zoe7]

It will be good to see Ayla and D and to get Ayla cuddles @BlueBay As you said - today is a settling in day - just get through the afternoon with this nurse on and see what happens tomorrow. Do you know how long you will be in there yet?

[BlueBay]

@Zoe7 I’m not 100% sure. I’m hoping not too long. 

I’ve told hubby he will need to go to bank on Thursday to consolidate our credit card to our home loan. Now I’m in here he has to go. 

I rang the community support centre and made an appt to see financial counsellor. Earliest appt is mid December. ✅

how are you tiday @Zoe7 hsve been thinking of you. Xxxx

[Zoe7]

It is about time hubby took on some of the financial responsibility @BlueBay 

I am having a rest day - I felt much better last night than I do today - think it was the adrenalin plus a very nice day weather wise helping me feel better. I missed the pool today - fell asleep this morning and slept right through my pool time. I did the same last Thursday so need to make sure I get to the pool this Thursday.

I have a very big day tomorrow - gp, DBT, pdoc and psychologist all in the same day - I expect to be very tired and drained afterwards.

[BlueBay]

Yiu will be tired tomorrow @Zoe7 rest up when you can ❤️

im in dining room eating dinner alone. I hate it everyone together. 

I just want to curl up and die. I’m going back to my room where it’s safe 

Feeling alone sucks 😢

[Zoe7]

You are where you need to be at the moment @BlueBay and I am sure the more you immerse yourself in the programs the less alone you will feel. Be open to those connections you can make - that is one thing with DBT I have found that really helps.

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay

atm you are experiencing Transitional Ambivalence - it's very normal - you've been battling alone for such a long time it's really challenging to face your decision and look at the issues that have brought you to hospital - which have been pretty obvious to many of us for a while

I suggest you use the time to recover for the first couple of days and then don't worry about the other people - concentrate on  your own concerns and make plans for when you recover - it will take a little time

I spent enough time in the Melbourne Clinic a long time ago to know it's challenging in hospital - I often felt rather raw especially in the early days - 

Just take your time

Dec

[BlueBay]

Day 2 hospital:

showered ✅

breskfast ✅

group therapy 

lunch

group therapy

seeing my psych today 

slept all night considering my shoulder is sore. I must have been exhausted as I went to sleep early 

i have a single room which is unusual as you normally go into shared room. But I got a nice single room. I have a feeling my psych wanted me in urgent so that’s why I got in so quickly 

Hope you are all ok. Thinking of you all. @Zoe7@Owlunar@utopia@Razzle@outlander@Faith-and-Hope ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️