Lived Experience Forum

[TL2017]

Hi, I'm new here and just looking for support and information from any other Mum has in regards to memory loss whilst suffering PND...
I'm currently on antidepressants and anti anxiety medications which perhaps could be causing the short term memory loss however it seems so significant over the past few days in particular that it's frightening me. I'm struggling to hold conversations with others and remember basic day to day tasks. Is anyone experiencing this or is it just me?!!
Thanks

[CherryBomb]

Hi @TL2017,

Thanks for writing your first post. I'm going to mention @PANDA, they are a specialist perinatal anxiety and depression service (see here for more info), who are one of our partner organisations.

They should get back to you shortly. 

[Former-Member]

Hi, when i'm really very low i have had trouble remembering things and constantly lose things. once i remember looking at my son and having no idea who he was, thought i was looking at someone elses baby. it was only for a few seconds but it frightened me so much i thought i coudlnt be a mum as i had obviously lost the plot. but there was so much goign on in my life, i was exhausted and very depressed/anxious. i started medication when he was about 9 months (i'd had difficulty with medications in the past for reasons i wont go into now) but it did get better. if you can talk to your gp or PANDA or child health nurse they will definitely be able to help. you're definitely not alone,

take care,

lj

[Lunar]

Hello @TL2017,

That does sound quite terrifying not being able to remember basic day to day tasks, but also sounds quite common for anxiety and feeling very overwhelmed.

It might be helpful to write lists and keep check of things that are written rather than having a whole bunch of different thoughts running around in your mind? It's good to do some grounding exercises that bring you back into your body and out of your mind if your thoughts are racing. Things like breathing, smelling, touching and hearing things can help make you feel more calm. And focusing one one task at a time.

Take care ❤️

Lunar

[Heart]

How are you going today @TL2017,

Would setting reminders on you phone be of any help as well as making lists.

These help me and I agree with @Lunar, try doing just one thing at a time, I know that can be hard being a mum. But you also have to take care of you so if that means saying "not just now" to another task/thing let it be.

Make sure you take time to look after your self particually rest and nutrition.

Speak soon

[Pebbles]

Hi @TL2017

Thank you for your post, I love seeing people reaching out for help and support.

Please don't be too hard on yourself, as a mother myself I think we need to go easy on ourselves. There's so much we juggle as parents and forgetting things along way is a natural part of parenthood and juggling PND too. I can understand how frustrating it is to be mid sentence and then become speechless, I've felt like that too. I know that I feel best equipped when I have my supports in place, and am able to live a balanced lifestyle; food, sleep, excercise, time with the family, time away from the family and so on. 

Have you had a look at the PANDA website? They also have a great helpline if you feel like you need a chat Mon to Fri, 10am - 5pm AED on 1300 726 306.

Pebbles  🙂

[TL2017]

Thank you all for your advice and suggestions. I have always been someone who loves making lists and reminders in my phone so I find that does help me. Also having pen and paper next to my bed to write things down as they come to me gives me comfort! I'm glad I'm not the only one experiencing this. I have a 2 year old and 4 month old who keep me quite busy, but since my diagnosis and 2 separate hospital admitions to perinatal metal health units we have hired some help and asked for more family support.
When reflecting over the past 4 months, I have so many times which I just cannot remember clearly at all. Is that my brains way of protecting me and making me forget some of the really tough stages?? It's all so foggy. I can blame stronger sedating medications for some times of forgetfulness but the other times really do frighten me. I can remember some day to day things like when I last fed me baby, sleep times, tasks around the house but sometimes when I'm asked questions I cannot give proper answers, no matter how calm I'm feeling or how hard I try 😔 It's such an annoying side effect of this illness I guess!

[Heart]

Hello @TL2017, Great to hear that you have hired some help and asked for family support. This is a great move for you to be able to get the support you need. Your forgetting and fogginess may be a way of you body/brain protecting yourself, telling you to take it easy. And the medication may also be adding to that.

Glad to hear that you are making lists and setting reminders on your phone. Just remember that everything on the list is just a reminder and not a 'have to be done list', so you don't burn yourself out more. 

You said about when you are asked questions you find it hard to give the proper answer. Take your time to answer and think about the questions when the situation allows you to. Not idea all the time but try it when you can.

Hope today is a good day for you.

[Pebbles]

Good Morning @TL2017

You surely are busy with having a 2 year old and a 4 month old, I imagaine you would be good at multitasking! Lists and writing notes are a must for me too, many Mum's I know can't live without them. Finding a way that works for you in order to help you feel like you are managing and are feeling supported is important and it sounds like you are finding your way which is great. 

My children are 8 and 4 years old and sometimes I still feel foggy/vauge in response to some questions. I rememebr sitting in my mothers group and having so many moments where I couldn't find the words to complete my sentence or I just didn't feel like I had anything I could say. Sometimes giving that part of yourself a voice can be helpful for example, letting the person who you are talking with know that you can't think of the words right now or I've forgotten what I was going to say. Trying to loose the judgemnt that we as humans can place on ourselves. It is ok not to know right now. 

There are some great stories of other peoples experiences of PND and their recovery on the PANDA wedsite which you can find here.

Have you other community support from your stay at the perinatal MH unit? 

Hope you can find moments for yourself as the day progresses.

Take Care,

Pebbles 🙂

[Former-Member]

HI @TL2017

Oh yes, i use my phone calandar for everything and set reminders.

My kids are 2 and a half years apart to the day, it was busy having a 2 year old and newborn. I'm really glad to hear that you have a lot of support via family and help in the house. 

I wonder if you've been able to talk to your psychiatrist about the memory stuff and what they think.. do they think its the illness or side effect from meds? i know when i was on different meds i could get really hazy and just no remember things as well. 

take care,

lj