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08-01-2017 04:19 AM
08-01-2017 04:19 AM
The PDoc Blues (poem)
Two-hundred-thousand hours have gone by,
And in the millions of minutes of madness,
All I've heard you do is lie
How you can fix my sadness.
You say you fully understand,
And that you know the score.
So tell me Doc, I'd like to know,
How long you have ill for?
I'm sure you try your best to care,
But there's falsehood in your affinity,
You cannot feel what isn't there,
Or correctly imagine infinity.
You claim honesty as you sit in your chair,
That it bothers you what I'm relaying,
But I wonder how long you'll continue to care,
When you realise I haven't been paying.
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08-01-2017 10:07 AM
08-01-2017 10:07 AM
Re: The PDoc Blues (poem)
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14-01-2017 08:19 AM
14-01-2017 08:19 AM
Re: The PDoc Blues (poem)
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14-01-2017 09:28 AM
14-01-2017 09:28 AM
Re: The PDoc Blues (poem)
hello @Former-Member
You sound as though you have been deeper within your depression.
I sense anger or rage now which is a feeling i usually have when the depth of my depression starts to shift.
I also experience self-loathing, agitiation, irritation.
Are you aware of transference during your sessions with your psychiatrist?
I think that it is extremely important that you read your writing to your psychiatrist. This will give him or her a clear picture of your present feelings.
If you still feel as though you want to change your psychiatrist you could also talk about that with him or her.
Remember the most important person in the treatment is you.
I suggest that you dont change psychiatrists until you have done this and also whilst your mood is so low.
When it passes, then you will be able to think more rationally, take your time this is a very important decision. then do what you believe is the best thing for you.
If you decide to cease treatment with the psychiatrist make an appointment with your gp to discuss this fact.
the journey is hard but we become stronger as a result. it is also part of our journey in recovery.
We have to realise how difficult it is, just by the sheer fact that the illness is such a big part of us.
good luck on your own journey