Celebrating all the (little) good things that happen 😊

[Former-Member]

So, I've searched the forums for a 'good things' post, but the only one I could find was full of birthdays and I don't want to rain on that parade. 

Anyway, I'm feeling up and up and I've just organised some long distance bushwalks with a friend of a friend for later in the year and I am very excited about it. 

And tomorrow I go back to work and my boss was super supportive when I spoke to her today. Yay! (yay for an income and paying my bills!)

[Former-Member]

Sounds fabulous @Former-Member. Well done. That news has bought a smile to my face. 💜🤗😁

[Former-Member]

Hello @Former-Member,

Oh that is wonderful news, enjoy your first day back! That will be nice to finally get some income 🙂

Long distance bushwalking sounds amazing, I'd also love to do more of that this year and especially with friends! How long are you thinking? I have never done anything overnight but it sounds like so much fun, you just have to be very prepared!

Lunar 🙂

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member (yes I'm posting at work.... 😞 )
I'm thinking 7-10 days at this stage. I'd like to do longer down the track, but I don't know how I'll cope, so I'll build upto it. I've done several 7-10 day walks before so I know I can do hat. 🙂
Yay for bushwalking! I hope you get out there and do some this year.
And planning - it's not any more planning for a 2 day walk as it is a 10 day walk. It's just more food! 🙂

[Former-Member]

How do I explain to cute guy at work that I am socially awkward around him because I think he's cute? I would just directly say just that......
BUT I'm not in the position for a relationship right now (if ever!).
Arrggghhhh! 😞

Stop being weird!!!!

[Former-Member]

So sweet @Former-Member!  I've been in my relationship so long that I love reminders of the early stuff.  It's all so agonising and charged with feeling.  You won't believe me but it's likely that you'll miss it one day.  A long-term relationship can be a lovely thing but charged with feeling it ain't!

If you do find yourself willing to give things a shot, just make sure you make lots of eye contact.  If you're lucky there'll be no need for words.  Good luck either way 🙂

[Former-Member]

Oh @Former-Member.
If only I could. I can't do relationships. Nothing in the world scares me more.
I've never really had a relationship (I'm 30) because of how bad it is.
I run, *literally* run away.
If only I could.
I want a family more than anything in the world and it pains me that I cannot. I just wish I could. 😞

[Former-Member]

Many of us are terrified at the thought of a relationship @Former-Member.  I didn't have my first serious relationship until I was in my early 30's and it was mostly fear that kept me dabbling at the edges before then.  The motivation I needed to push through the fear was realising that I wanted to be a mother.  So I went searching, found a good one and pushed through the fear.  There may have been alcohol involved 🙂 

It can still happen D.  But not without courage.

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Former-Member,
I don't think you understand how big of an issue it is though.
It's big.
It's not just normal nerves.
There is so much fear and pain.
I've been pretty badly assaulted as a 12 year old and that caused ptsd and a massive fear of intimate activities.
And then there is the issue of trust and emotional closeness.
Gosh..... I should print this off and give it to my psych. I've been trying to build myself up to say all of this to her, but chickening out again and again.

[Former-Member]

You're right - I didn't understand the whole picture @Former-Member but it's good that you do and have such a clear understanding of the barriers.  This means you can start working towards healing - to feeling feel safe enough to allow yourself to be open and vulnerable one day.

That's a great idea - take your phone to your next session and let your therapist read your story.  There'll be no judgement.  Just a chance to do the deeper work needed.  Do you think you can?