Lived Experience Forum

[MDT]

I hate it

I'm struggling with it and everyone is fake.

I have 1 friend who I can talk to about anything and still he is a good friend but he is limited in life experience 

I'm going to bed now and hopefully I can find answers in my sleep 

[oceangirl]

I can relate to how you feel @MDT  I truly do. 

And I agree many people seem to be shallow and fake

I hope you can find your tribe and people that are geninue and decent folk. You deserve the best my friend. Talk to you soon Hams

[oceangirl]

@MDT I have my dad staying with me and I am taking him to his appointment tomorrow at the hospital. I probably will not be back on until later tomorrow afternoon or evening. 

[Former-Member]

Hey @MDT hope you're doing better than you were before bed. People have an outer layer which protects who they really are, through "personality" I saw it on a YouTube video by Dr Jobor Mate. I hope the rest of the day today is kinder to you. Here if you need a chat. 

I also have friends but they're always quiet - only 1 that's a bit more talkative but I feel he's a bit of a narcissist as in self serving. Quiet a few around me tbh - but it is what it is. Setting boundaries works if ever you find yourself in that position.

anyways have a good day

[MDT]

Thanks @Former-Member @oceangirl
I have put dating apps on hold. Just on snooze. I think maybe I was using it to plug a gap. Maybe I need to experience that gap some more to find some answers within myself.

I still dunno about this job and I am also coming to terms with things that happened when I was younger and how this is something I have only just come to accept. It explains why it's always been difficult for me to be vulnerable with girls but also why it's hard for me to put myself put there. This was something I explained to my psych and my parents. I have noticed that they aren't pressing me much for anything. I needed to be honest to them you see. They are good people.
They raised me after all.

My psych has mentioned to me that something casual with a girl is ok. I agree it's okay. But I don't believe I'm in a headspace for it. At least not until I have a few more answers within myself.

Last night I came across a diary I kept when I went overseas. 3 years yesterday is when I went on my trip to the US and Poland. It was strange reading how insightful I was back then. But it was nice I'm a way to go back to it. I wrote about many things.

Right now I'm on my way to work. The clouds are quite grey but I guess that matches my feelings atm. So its not an issue.

Yes. I feel lonely. But I also believe that maybe this is a human thing we all feel. So in fact, I am not alone in my loneliness.
As inwrote in my travel diary 3 years ago - the most important thing is connection. So thats what I'll try to bring to my interactions with people

There is a lot to br said for that when we deal with Mh

[Appleblossom]

@Former-Member @oceangirl 

@MDT We often learn the hard way who are real friends and who are not.  I recently had a "blast from the past" moment, meeting a person who triggered good memories from when I was 17. You do the emotional work.That is what matters, and it will keep unfolding. People are limited and shaped by their experiences, which is where acceptance comes in.  More people is not necessarily better. You are the best thermometer for figuring out that.  Keep being you.

[cloudcore]

Hi @MDT ,

It has been challenging to find meaningful friendships for me too, and so I hear you and can understand the loneliness you're feeling. I will be making a space on the forums to address loneliness today, but I just want to acknowledge this thread and how you are feeling. I hope that the support you have recieved here has been meaningful and that you will feel welcome to join the upcoming thread too 

[MDT]

Work is a bit weird atm but in learning it I think
There are supports here. But i just to learn by doing

Thanks @Appleblossom @cloudcore

[Rhye]

Hey @cloudcore @MDT ,

I just thought I'd jump in here and post the thread that @cloudcore created because I agree that it might be super relevant to this discussion: https://saneforums.org/t5/Our-stories/Loneliness/m-p/1121631/highlight/true#M221360

Hope that's okay @cloudcore, I just read both these threads and thought how it was such fortuitous timing 

[HenryX]

@MDT, @Former-Member , @Appleblossom , @Rhye , @cloudcore 

I've got 40 minutes before I go to a singing group where from 3 to 6 or 7 of us meet. The lady who co-ordinates the group lives about 20 km out of town. The singing group is not the only on. There is CWA, RSL. Over here in WA these are not huge money making concerns - I have put a note elswhere about my presentation of the 3 memorial days during the year, we are a group of a half dozen with an attendance at the memorial services of between 50 and 100 people. This lady is involved with the school and another couple of groups. She is not intrusive, simply active and always there. I relate this detail because she and her husband are just plain ordinary nice people. Often helping others in the community in very practical, hands on ways.

We can't all be like that couple, but we can get out and make a difference that will enhance our own sense of self worth and sometimes help others.

I'm currently dealing with issues that come from the other end of my life. It can be lonely but even my contact with other members of the forum gives me part of my reason for getting up each day, despite physical dysfunction that others would certainly find distressing.

That's my contribution for now. I have offered other thoughts on other threads that may also be of interest but now I need to get dressed to go out to singing.

With My Best Wishes For The Evening

@HenryX